Today's blog is the final one in my series on friendships. Have you experienced conflict in a friendship that produced good fruit from it? Conflict can be tense, unsettling, a test of pride but it can also be a good thing for the both of you. When conflict arises, it can be a great time of reflection...what did I say exactly, was my response prideful, what does Scripture say about the issue, and are my actions respectful and not hurtful? Communication from both parties is key to a resolution, but if that's not happening, take the initative to open up the conversation without being pushy or demanding. Sometimes we all need space and time to think things through, be patient. Talking it out makes us vulnerable and brings out insecurities in us. Most conflict is unintentional, but if you point it out then they will know how you feel and harboring bitterness can be avoided.
For myself, I try to let new relationships know, "If something I do or say bothers you in some kind of way, let me know. I can't fix or stop something, if I don't know it's a problem. And I hope, I can feel free to do the same with you."
I also want to talk today about 'availability' in friendships. I believe this is one of the most important aspects of true, godly friendships. We live in a world where communication is easier than it has ever been. We can talk in person, by phone, by email, by messenger and we can choose what hour of the day is best for us. We all have busy, hectic lives, but we also all have a need to talk to someone. A friend is the best answer to that need. We must be intentional with our time for friends. For example, if a friend reaches out just before you're about to go to bed, can you spare a few minutes and delay bedtime for them? That moment may be their only time to open up, share vulnerable thoughts, and be willing to listen to something other than their own thoughts. Being available means putting others before yourself and isn't that what God calls us to do.
"It just feels good to know you belong somewhere." Friendship is an encouraging bond that is a blessing and gift from God. Ecclesiastes 4:12 "Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." Ecclesiastes 4:10 "If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up." Friendships have purpose and they are meant to help us finish this race we're on called life. Go out today and make a new friend.
